Hey World its Wonka, this post is just because I need to get some stuff out there for two reasons, 1 to hold my self accountable, 2 because I need to write them down so I wont forget them and learn from them.

July and August have been two really really hard months, early on in July I did some thing and hurt a lot of people in my life who love me, support me, spoil me and definitely did not deserve for me to do this.

I got help through therapy and programs to help me past my problem, however I was missing something…. I was missing something very important…..the lil things in life

After all was said and done … and I was 3 days away to return to work and get my routine back and what happens…. I get a fever! 2 days go by and the fever continues… from 101.3 to 102.5 to 103.9 and staying steady at the 103.9.

I finally decide to get to the hospital, fast forward 4 days and I still had the fever, add bright red skin, itching from head to toe, restlessness, and still no clue what was causing the fever even after testing for all known viruses were done, including things I cant pronounce much less even spell…

I was feeling beat I really had 0 hope, today fever is gone, I am not out of the woods; it was found I had some bacteria on a heart valve and will undergo a series of 6-8 weeks out patient IV antibiotic treatments.

So why is it I title this “don’t take the little things that matter for granted”

To often times we so caught up in other things like what other people think… I remember being consumed by how I was going to appear to the audience on the lypsync battle contest, or where we work or impressing people who don’t matter while lifting up the ones that do..

I spend so much time yelling at my mom because she’s a tad dramatic and worries to much.. Or yelling at my Dad for talking over every conversation, watching GoT at the Wonkakennel was like interactive TV lol. Getting stressed out cause my brother Is so hard on me cause of my actions in July, Joey for being so short fused, Pup for being so young at times

As I sit here in the hospital knowing that I am going to be ok but know I could not have been I just come to think

Mom I wouldn’t change you for the world; If I didn’t have you I wouldn’t be where I am today!!
Dad I understand the only reason you do that is because 1/2 the time the entire conversation or tv show Is in English I will make a strong attempt to talk more Spanish for you
Jen Kitty Tye Jon Pup and Daddy, I wouldn’t trade our interactive TV watching moments for any other tv watching moments ( skritches still happen :))

Ivan thank you for caring enough to be tough on me, I know you love me and you hate seeing me hurt my self

Daddy I wouldn’t Change anything about you , you are amazing – short tempered and all; thank you for being there for me, you are a good man!

Pup – we went through a very tough moment; I was 27 too and did somethings that I felt bad for at the end but we both did bad things and we both asked for forgiveness I wouldn’t trade you for nothing in world

So yea I got a lil personal there in the end it try to write these blogs from my heart and as you know my heart is all over the place all the time 🙂

But over all the moments with the people that matter cherish those, remember you only fight because you important to each other …. If you weren’t you just walk away and avoid it but you don’t. Cherish the small moments with the people in your family and family of choice.

I won’t go into sending love to mine on here to avoid accidently forgetting a name I’m still kind of sedated lol.. I can hear Michel Juhlin saying honey aren’t you always some what sedated lol

But I have an amazing family one that has been by me through everything and never once gave up, I cant even begin to tell you about my chosen family here, they all know who they are and God have I been blessed’ words cant even explain, and all my close friends far an abroad who are so freaking amazing..

See you can read that lil paragraph up there and think well that’s not a lil thing but un fortunately more time than not we take this for granted and we don’t cherish it and that’s what makes life, LIFE…

Now on a more serious note and not calling any one specific thing … but the next big thing that we treat as lil thing is our health to many time we take that for granted as well, im not going to pretend I am going walk on water from now on but I am going to do better and cherishing the lil things that are actually the biggest things in life , not letting what I thought was so big be big and occupy the majority of my brain, and I will watch my health!

This message has been brought to you by the surgeon general LOLOL JUST KIDDING!!


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